"How Far Would You Go For The Ring?"
I remember the scene in "The Color Purple" where the character Ms. Sofia gets married to Harpo. After they were pronounced husband and wife, rather than kiss her husband, Sofia turns to her family and friends and says, "I's married now!" Back then, and has it has been for generations afterwards, the goal for some women has been to get married and have some children. For some, it was simply to get married.
Forward wind to the present and you'll find that the idea of marriage may have fallen by the wayside and what's in it's place is simple co-habitation. Terms like "wifey" have become commonplace and the idea of traditional marriage is something that may be in the cards for some, but instead of it being in the immediate plans of the couple, it is pushed to the back...so far back that it may not be reached at all.
In "How Far Would You Go For The Ring?" author Roxie H. pushes the envelope and takes you into the sad world of a woman who lacked so much self-esteem that she was willing to endure anything to ensure that she came first in her man's life. She didn't even seem to be worried about fidelity...just as long as the man came home to her. I had to ask the author some questions that would help me understand the mindset of a woman that would allow so much to be done to her, while simultaneously inflicting her own set of pain in the wake of the poor choices she has made.
RH: Yes, I am Candice. I lived the life of a woman who endured the abuse, betrayal and manipulation for the sake of loving a man. My self-esteem and self worth was the lowest it has ever been in my life. I lived and breathed what ever my ex wanted from me. I sacrificed my being to one day aspire to be his wife.
JLW: Having walked in Candice's shoes (at least to a certain degree), what advice would you give to women that currently face the same situation as Candice?
RH: Some women invest many years in a relationship with a man feeling a sense of obligation that she should be the one they marry. He will not get better after you become his wife. Love yourself as hard as you love him and in doing so, you will see your value. The continued cheating, verbal and financial abuse is not worth the ring.
Really, what value does the ring have when you are crying every night? You are humiliated amongst your friends and family because they know he is a cheat, liar, beater and manipulator. Most women who have read my book come back and tell me they could identify themselves in some part of Candice’s life. They don’t want to be a Candice and they don’t want to love a Champ. It is easier to recognize bad decisions and choices in others besides ourselves.
I wrote the book in the hopes that women will see just how much we abuse ourselves in loving these types of men. Begin to love and respect yourself and others will have to do the same. It starts with your ladies. You are worthy to be loved; not used.
JLW: So now that you've written your first book, what is in next for Roxie H?
RH: I enjoy writing. I am currently writing my sophomore novel, "Sitting on the Pew". Also I am working on the sequel to How Far Will You Go For the Ring? My readers want to know what happens next for Candice. I am a motivational and public speaker. I plan to continue to tell my story and give words of encouragement to women. I speak about knowing your worth and empowering women.
JLW: How hard was it for you to transition yourself into the literary world and what advice would you give new authors?
RH: It is hard to get into the literary world. You need a mentor to assist you with the process. It takes a lot of hard work and dedication to travel the journey through typing the first word to your book to holding the finished book in your hand. Invest in a good editor. It is the most expensive service to get your book to print. It is also the most important one.
JLW: If there was one thing that you could change in the literary industry, what would it be?
RH: It is my belief writers are under paid professionals. I would change the compensation for the professionals in the literary industry.
To learn more about author Roxie H., please visit her website listed below:
~ J.L. Whitehead