Years ago, I wrote an article that ran on several publications. Every now and then, I feel the need to re-run it because I believe that the words are profound. At the time that I wrote it, I was of the mindset that we as a people have lost our way; and when I say we as a people, I mean everyone, not just African Americans. I started to think about how we could reclaim ourselves and begin the task of tearing down old ideologies and creating new ones...ones that will enrich our lives as opposed to taking from it. I thought about it carefully, and this is what I came up with:
Open Letter To My Brothers
Observance. Some of us do it more than others. Some of us have the capacity to do it on
larger scales. We’ve observed everything, from the injustices that have been
inflicted on races and cultures deemed as the minority, to the triumphs and
celebrations of those same communities.
Observance. It’s a strong word that carries a different
meaning to some of us, and yet, it’s something that I’ve repeatedly had to do
over the years since observance and objectivity should, but oftentimes does
not, run hand in hand.
I’ve watched
my brothers from all races transcend stereotypes…watched them as they loved and
lived, and I thought, without trying to come off preachy, maybe I could compose
an open letter to them and perhaps open an eye or two.
Now I don’t
believe for one moment that I’m some know-it-all guru, perhaps looking to be
the next Dr. Phil. Those are shoes that
I couldn’t begin to fill on my best day.
Still, I’d like to think that me approaching fifty buys me some wisdom,
or at least my interpretation of it anyway.
When we
elected President Barack Obama to office, we were all in agreement that it was
time for a change. However, at the time,
I didn’t realize the depths of how true those words would be. You see, it really is time for us to change
not only how we view ourselves, but how we view our race as a whole. For African Americans, we as a people have
been divided for far too long, probably for as long as we as a people have been
in this country. It was always us versus
us - field niggra versus house niggra, light-skinned versus dark skinned, haves
versus have nots…and the list continues.
And what better way to conquer a race of people than to have them
divided amongst themselves?
We’ve been
taught to degrade our women in music, television and literature. At times, we don’t allow for anyone elses
opinion but our own, as if an opinion that conflicts with what we believe
somehow translates to we are not being respected, no matter how articulate the
words presented are spoken.
Somehow, we
as African American men have brought into the hype that we don’t have value -
as if somehow, we are not deserving of a high paying position outside of sports
or music which directly impacts our right to live in affluent neighborhoods, afford
a comfortable lifestyle and leave a legacy to our children.
Somehow, we’ve
taken the terminology of respect and morphed it into something that we are
deserving of, but yet we don’t always feel the need to give it. This is not to say that all of us live by
these principalities, but enough of us do that it warrants a letter.
So here’s a
thought…and take from it whatever you may.
What if we begin and end everything with love? As simplistic as it may sound, it really isn’t
as easy as it seems to be.
You see, you
start off by loving God, or whatever you deem God to be. It doesn’t matter what you call God. What works for me may not work for you, but
one thing is certain that most of us can agree on. There is something much
larger than ourselves at work in our lives.
So let’s start with loving that.
For me, that something is God.
With that being said, it doesn’t matter what your experience with
traditional religion has been. Positive
or negative. Religion is just man’s way
of worshiping God as we know Him.
Love
yourself. Don’t let anyone dictate your
worth - and if they try, you don’t have to accept it, because no matter what
you do, there will always be someone who will think that they are better…perhaps
even having a false sense of entitlement which to them translates in their mind
that they are better, smarter and more deserving than you. Give yourself your
props, take your knocks and keep on going.
If you get hit hard and it knocks you off kilter, dust yourself off and
keep it moving. The world will keep
turning whether you are on it or not, so hang on with your head held high and
know that you were created in the image of love.
Love your
woman or life partner. This applies to
straight and gay alike. At the end of the day, the person that you’ve committed
yourself to is the person that you should be laying down with, and at one time
if not presently, they should have your back.
So cherish them. Hopefully, you’ll
get that love and adoration right back.
Love your
children if you have them. Teach them,
nurture them, lead them. Sometimes, we may associate a bad relationship with
them, but they are innocent. They had
nothing to do with whatever happened with their mother, so love them because
the simple fact is they need you.
Love your
people. Greet one another. Look each other in the eye…especially at
work. Take a stand and lead in your
community. Step up and love outside of
the box, because believe it or not, someone, somewhere will always have it
worse than you.
Brothers…and
by brothers I mean all of you. Black,
Asian, Latino, White or whatever culture that you belong to…gay or straight, it
doesn’t matter. It really is time for a
change. And it starts with you. Love God.
Love yourself. Love your life
partner - whether it is a he or she.
Love your children. Love your
people.
~ J.L. Whitehead
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